‘one last time’

I have heard the words one last time….One too many. I myself have said that it was seriously going to be the last time. I also believed myself when I said those words. Unfortunately, the words one last time have snuffed out another life…I wish that the reality of the situation would make people think and wake up. That is wishful thinking. I did dope long enough to know that people don’t think it will happen to them and that everyone says one last time at least a hundred times. I said one last time and ended up on the other side of a loaded .22 caliber rifle. I keep seeing the same pattern. Rehab or jail….yet these people who are supposedly clean are just putting up a front. I either hear guess who’s in jail or guess who overdosed or guess who’s back in rehab. People really really really need to realize that you can not just have your one last time. It might be your last time…and if it is you will find your peace. I think what so many people don’t realize is that you are at peace….but you leave family, friends, children, and significant others behind to pick up the pieces…and leave them with maybe a tiny bit of peace knowing that you are in a better place…but really they don’t feel peace they feel mostly heartache.  Please please please stop saying one last time. Too many lives have already been lost. All so young. The biggest thing I see is people do NOT listen to the fact that you literally have to drop all the dead weight, people say oh but their my boys or my girls or whatever. They are DEAD weight, and they will only hold you down.How can you say someone is your boy or your girl when they don’t RESPECT you enough to not be high in front of you when you decide to turn your life around…that’s what you call friends? This is not bullshit, it takes an ENTIRE 2 years for your brain to stop telling the body it wants heroin. All of you who think taking pain pills are okay, because it isn’t heroin or because it was prescribed. Wrong. If you find yourself in that situation, you need to own your addiction and let the doctor know that you have a problem with opiates….don’t let your addiction own you. Come on fight the fight, I promise it is worth it. Stop the it’s only ‘one last time’.

 

 

-loulou

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “‘one last time’

  1. Heroin wasn’t my thing (though I tried to have it be several times), crack and meth were my demons, but even so I know all too well the “just one more” craving. I lost count of how many times I relapsed in the last 3 years, this is the first time I got more than 60 days (I have almost 4 months now). Don’t think that you can never use drugs again, just think don’t use for today, do it one day at a time, or one hour at a time, or one minute at a time if you have to. I hope things get better for you soon. Peace.

    1. And I just re read your comment. I just wanted to let you know that the post is not about me. I have over 2 years clean and it will be 3 years this October. I do appreciate you saying that you hope things get better. I also live by you can only do things one day at a time. Don’t worry about the past and don’t think about the future, just the present. All the best to you and being clean.

      -loulou

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s